Half the Trouble is in the Trying…

I think this is pretty self-explanatory...

So another week of rehab almost gone by, release date is coming up fast. They say I’m making progress but of course it doesn’t always seem like it. But I feel a bit stronger, my transfers to and from the chair to the bed, toilet, etc. are getting better, graduated off the slide board very quickly and 9 times out of 10 I can clear the transfer first time. But that tenth time when I get it wrong can get real ugly…

They did a ‘procedure’ Wednesday to take out an intravenous blood clot filter that was stuck into one of my bigger veins in my leg 5 months ago during my trauma surgery. Apparently you’re supposed to take them out with 4-6 weeks of install, guess that one slipped through the cracks. They put me into a radiology operating room and had to use x-rays and ultrasounds and stuff to find the thing, then used a whole bunch of wires and stuff to go try and get it. They did all this though a whole in my neck. Medicine is really weird. Today my neck feels like I got hit by a baseball bat so they must have been wrenching on it pretty good.

I could do with a few years of no more procedures… ;-)

We went on our big Saturday ‘outing’ today, I got to pick where we went so I chose Valley Fair Mall, the biggest most crowded mall in the area. I figured let’s jump into the deep end, if I can manage a big crowded place like that, can manage a lot of other places. Went into a few stores to pretend to shop, some were more accessible than others, the Apple store was a real mess, but that’s a mess even on foot. Some of the others were very hesitant in the stores and moving through the crowd but I just figured “the hell with it, I deserve to be here just like the rest of the normal folks” so I just acted like I was on foot. A few people stared at me in the chair but not very many, I either smiled at them or gave them the angry white guy look, both were effective. Luckily I don’t do malls very much anyway, but if I did I’d probably grab a friend to go with mostly to help get stuff that’s too high to reach. Definitely won’t be able to try on pants to see if they fit, that’s a 20 minute exercise in frustration in a chair, all the while hoping you don’t strain too much and pee/poop. That would be an interesting litte episode in the dressing rooms at Nordstroms.

Tuesday we did a dinner night where a few of us cooked a full meal in the kitchen they have here for us to try and use and get familiar with doing household tasks. That was ok, but the more normal they tried to make us feel the more abnormal we really felt. I guess that’s part of the adjustment process. But I still made a really bitchen angel hair pasta with basil tomato sauce...

My new apartment is now full of some of my stuff thanks to Ethan and Stacy Nagel, Eddy Gonzalez and Cheryl, Jeff Gruetter and Shahin and Michelle Pirooz, all very good friends who I owe more than I can repay through this ordeal. Thanks very much guys, can’t even begin to tell you how much you all mean to me.

Attitude is getting a bit better, only pooped my pants once this week so that’s progress and definitely helps the attitude, and that episode was mostly due to the drugs that gave me Wednesday. Getting stronger as well but the shoulders are taking a beating, esp. my right shoulder which is already sketchy due to surgery 3 years ago. Trying very hard to ‘move out of the middle’, as I wrote about last time. Finding the willingness to even try is a battle at times, it seems so daunting to commit to a future in a chair when you’re barely able to do anything right and all day you worry about basic body functions. But the willingness is coming. Half the effort is in the trying.

Five more days and I’m outta here and in my own place finally after almost 6 months of being in one institution or another. Stay tuned for that fun … ;-)